Showing posts with label Humor. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Humor. Show all posts

Tuesday, September 04, 2007

Study and Fun

I am one of those weird people who loves school (except at the end of the semester when I can't wait for the course to be over). I am a bona-fide geek. I know that is hard to believe, but if I am ever lost, just look for me in the theology section of any local library (the library at school is probably you best bet).

One of the courses I am taking this semester is Theology of St. Thomas Aquinas. I am looking forward to this class immensely. It should be excellent. Three months studying the Summa Theologiae sounds like theological heaven. Of course, in two months I may be saying otherwise. Our textbook, Knowing the Love of Christ, looks like an orthodox one. It is written by two professors from Ave Maria University, Michael Dauphinais & Matthew Levering. I don't know anything about them, but the notes on the back of the book are from well respected theologians. Plus, is got a positive review from First Things, so I expect it to be good.

Since I begin Thomistics on Thursday, here is a little Aquinas humor.



Summa Theologica, I.3.9

Ninth Article

Is God made of soap?

We proceed thus to the Ninth Article:

Objection 1: It would seem that God is made of soap. For whatever is highest in a genus must be predicated of God. But the highest in the genus of cleanliness, which the Philosopher says is next to godliness, is soap.

Objection 2: Moreover, Scripture says, "Wash me, and I shall be clean indeed." But it belongs to soap to wash.

Objection 3: Furthermore, Dionysius says in On the Divine Names, "For the being of the Most High, being beyond Being, which is what is, can only be denied, as of foamy lather that surpasses even the most excellent conception." But the principle of foamy lather is soap, and where the effect is found, there must the principle be posited.

On the contrary is the opinion of Saint Augustine, who says, "I did wander long among vain fancies, thinking that thou wert as the soap that cleanseth all things, and that evil was a grimy blot on thy purity."

I answer that, 'Soap' can be said in two ways. In one way, soap is the material principle of cleanliness as such. But we have already shown that there is no material principle in God. Therefore, God is not made of soap. But in another way, 'soap' is said of whatever is highest in the order of efficient causes directed towards cleanliness secundum quid by an order that is less than formal with respect to the finality of an end, simply as such, without respect of quiddity in potentiality to the sensitive appetite. And in this sense all men say that God is made of soap, and that in the highest degree, as is plain from the definition.

Reply Obj. 1: Soap is not the highest in the genus of cleanliness, as the Saponians heretically maintain, but only in the genus of material ablutions, which is related to cleanliness in the way that principles of natural reason are related to the eternal law, as the Psalmist says, "How shall a young man cleanse his way? By keeping to your law."

Reply Obj. 2: Scripture also says, "I will wipe away every tear from their eyes." But soap is an efficient cause of tears, and not of their remotion. Therefore, God is not made of soap.

Reply Obj. 3: In this place Dionysius understands 'foamy lather' in accordance with the way of remotion, so that it implies only the lack of such qualities as are inconsistent with foamy lather, as shortness of duration and irritation to the skin.


Thursday, April 19, 2007

Inflatable What?

H/T to the Ironic Catholic.
I thought this was a joke when I first heard about it, but it's for real.

Can you imagine this ad? (Note this is not a real ad for this product)

Is your local parish being unaccommodating? Are they preventing you from having the wedding of your dreams? Are you upst that they are requiring that you are follow church rules and Catholic doctrine? Just don't want to be bothered going to church?

Well, I have found the church for you. You can rent or buy the inflatable church where the theology and morality is as soft as the blown up vinyl non-structure. Even better, this church comes to you. You can worship in the comfort of your own backyard. Complete with plastic "stained glass" windows, airbrush artwork, inflatable organ, altar, pulpit, pews, candles and a gold cross. Even the doors are flanked by air-filled angels. The manufacturer claims this church can be built in 2 hours and dis-assembled in less than one.

After your magical non-religious wedding, you can have your reception at the inflatable pub.

Finally the church of me has found a home.

Thursday, February 15, 2007

Medieval Tech Support

H/T to Rob, who got it from the Ironic Catholic and so on.




Just a reminder that some things never change.

In case anyone is wondering this clip comes from a Norwegian show called Øystein & Meg (Øystein & I).

Some of the You Tube comments are pretty good too.
Here are a few:

"I fully expected the book to catch on fire because of the candle, and for the 'user' to say, 'SEE! I LOST THE TEXT!' "

"Thats great, but wait until Book 2.0 comes out...he will be SCREWED! LMAO!!!! "

Sunday, February 04, 2007

Waiting for the Tridentine Indult?

Fr. Z has his ideas on the date and I have mine.

Personally, I have seen so many dates come and go that I don't know if it will ever happen. However, I doubt it will be on February 22.



Jeff has created a Indult date predictor. I have it located in at the top of the sidebar. It gives random dates, so it is bound to be correct at least once.



H/T to Brian for this cartoon which was created by Paul Nichols.




Thursday, February 01, 2007

Just As I Thought


Almost Perfect- INFP
40% Extraversion, 60% Intuition, 33% Thinking, 40% Judging

So, you want to make the world a better place? Too bad it's never gonna happen.

Of all the types, you have to be one of the hardest to find fault in. You have a selfless and caring nature. You're a good listener and someone who wants to avoid conflict. You genuinely desire to do good.

Of course, these all add up to an incredibly overpowered conscience which makes you feel guilty and responsible when anything goes wrong. Of course, it MUST be your fault EVERYTIME.
Though you're constantly on a mission to find the truth, you have no use for hard facts and logic, which is a source of great confusion for those of us with brains. Despite this, in a losing argument, you're not above spouting off inaccurate fact after fact in an effort to protect your precious values.

You're most probably a perfectionist, which in this case, is a bad thing. Any group work is destined to fail because of your incredibly high standards.

Disregard what I said before. You're just easy to find fault in as everyone else!

Luckily, you're generally very hard on yourself, meaning I don't need to waste my precious time insulting you. Instead, just find all your own faults and insult yourself.

Take the test for

Sunday, December 17, 2006

I Am the Person of the Year

Yes, I am Time Magazine's person of the year.
An since you are reading this you are too.

Read all about it here.

Thursday, November 30, 2006

I couldn't resist


Hmmm, if I could grow a beard like that
I would really look like Santa!

Fun With Latin

Jimmy Akin has posted a list of handy Latin phrases. Here are a few of my favorites:

Sentio aliquos togatos contra me conspirare. I think some people in togas are plotting against me.

Caesar si viveret, ad remum dareris. If Caesar were alive, you'd be chained to an oar.

Quantum materiae materietur marmota monax si marmota monax materiam posit materiari? How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

Nihil curo de ista tua stulta superstitione. I'm not interested in your dopey religious cult.

Noli me vocare, ego te vocabo. Don't call me, I'll call you.

Utinam logica falsa tuam philosophiam totam suffodiant! May faulty logic undermine your entire philosophy!

Sic faciunt omnes. Everyone is doing it.

Fac ut vivas. Get a life.

Friday, November 03, 2006

Whether You Like it or Not!

Some love it, some like it, some can't stand it. Either way the past is the future and the present is the past.



...oh, and I have no expectations for tomorrow.

Jack: The Depressed Pumpkin

Fr. Roderick has made a very cute, very funny halloween, All Saints Day, All Souls Day movie.
I tried to post this yesterday, but my internet connection wasn't cooperating.



Enjoy!

Saturday, September 24, 2005

You know the old joke about liturgists?

You are a

Social Moderate
(41% permissive)

and an...

Economic Liberal
(31% permissive)

You are best described as a:

Totalitarian




Link: The Politics Test on OkCupid